Cath Asks, "Do you feel that getting married, ...

having children has destroyed them emotionally,spiritually + finacially?Was the pain worth it? How many surgeries have you had? If it is between your ears and not your legs, then why did you do it? Have you had sex reassignment. Hope you can enlighten me.

Hi Cath! Thanks for your inquiry and interest!
I've tried in life to do the right thing and live without regrets. And certainly my married years and those as a husband, father and now grandparent are very special, and I treasure them as well as my career in corporate America. Growing up in the midwest in the fifties and sixties ("yes" I'm now somewhat "old") certainly did not allow any consideration of changing one's gender or a sexual orientation other than heterosexual for that matter. So I felt in the past decade or so that the time was right for my transition.
And whereas "destroyed" is probably too strong a word, certainly family, friends and acquaintances were shocked. Some family members were very accepting of my news while others are just too hurt and confused to accept me in my new identity. I am not able to predict who will and who won't be accepting. My transition began about three years ago and I did not cross dress for the past forty, hurtful, painful years.
But my transition as I think do most has come at a very high cost; the largest of which has been the severed relations with several family members and longtime friends. Financially I have spent many thousands of dollars on five surgeries - breasts, face and recently gender or sex reassignment surgery and am consiering a sixth. Two years of therapists and ongoing with no end date in sight electrolysis is more money spent than I wish to count.
However! I have never been happier and felt my decision to transition was my only alternative. I reached the point where I had no choice and am most grateful I found the support I needed, live in a time and place where it is accepted, and had the financial resources to affect the change.
It has been and continues to be a journey unlike any other. I now see better what was a fuzzy picture of life and view myself as less deceptive, frustrated and confused. I have never been as physically, spiritually, emotionally and psychologically healthy. And this fitness is a result of finally achieving a truthful inner feeling to myself in my new identity. I pray others will accept me in what is only my new packaging.
I hope this helps and if you have any further comments or questions I will see them on our blog. Best regards, Bertie 9/17/11